Hello my adorably adoring fans! I am truly sorry that it has taken me so long to write another blog post. Unless of course you hate being subjected to reading my mumblings and rants, in which case I will say: "you are most welcome for the delay."
Today I would like to address an issue that has been plaguing me since I was 15 years old. It all started this one fine summer's day when my little brother, Isaac, and I were walking around the local dollar store in Pierre. I had twenty dollars in my pocket, and when you have twenty dollars in a dollar store...you are royalty. Anyway, I was wandering around the store and i happened upon a rubber band gun; not the cheapy little plastic ones that you used to get in a kid's meal. I'm talking about a LEGIT rubber band gun. It was made out of wood, probably a foot long and it could hold 8 rubber bands at one time. EIGHT!!!!!! The best part is that it was only two dollars (being in a dollar store, I thought it somewhat ironic, but I didn't care). Needless to say, I was flipping out. I thought that it was the best thing that had ever happened to me. Being the awesome big brother that I am, I decided to buy one for Isaac, too so that we could have killer awesome rubber band shoot outs that inevitably would have ended in me getting in trouble.
I stepped up to the counter to pay just as my father was walking in. The lady rang it up and a heard the long beep that no under age shopper wants to hear. The evil troll behind the counter looked at me with her drool dripping from her massive fangs and she oh so snobbishly asked me, "Are you 18, kid?" As I saw my long anticipated future of snapping Isaac in the face with rubber bands slowly fall apart, I innocently said, "No, but it's only a rubber band gun."
"'Gun' is the key word, Toots," said the troll. "You have to be 18."
Just then, in a lightning fast flash of bravery and overall fatherly goodness, my dad stepped in and said, "I'll buy them, Mam." I was a little confused as to why my father would refer to the evil troll as "Mam," but I quickly dismissed it. I was too happy to worry about anything because I was about to get my rubber band guns! However, my dreams were once again crushed when the evil, green troll bellowed and said, "Oh, I can't allow that. You'd just give the guns to them."
We walked out of the store...empty handed.
Defeated.
I had never dealt with something so ridiculous, and I haven't since then...until a couple days ago.
My girlfriend had just got a second job and her hours were from 4am to 10am, so I took her to walmart to get some 5-hour energy. We got a 4-pack and went to the self check out. I rang it up and that little screen popped up that said "Please wait for assistance." I was slightly baffled because I've bought 5-hour energy in Pierre before and have never had a problem with it. The lady came up to me (this one wasn't a troll...she was quite kind) and asked if I was 18. I told her that I was 19 (which is true), but she asked to see my driver's license. I showed her and then she turned to Nikki and asked to see her I.D. too. She had it, but it was out in the car, so I told the lady that it was for me and I was the one paying for it. However, the lady said that she had to check both of our id's because she didn't know if I would turn right around and hand it out to a minor. Nikki ran out, got her id, and we got the 5-hour energy. Problem solved.
Now... (here comes the rant) I can understand these laws of having to check the I.D's of the entire party in cases involving either alcohol or tobacco because those can actually be harmful and addicting. There is no proof that 5 hour energy is harmful unless taken in excess (but soda can also be harmful if taken in excess). From the miniscule amount of research that I've done, I've found that most accounts of people being hospitalized are like the story of this guy who had a heart attack and is trying to sue 5-hour energy for millions of dollars even though he can't prove that 5-hour energy was the cause of his heart attack.
It's stuff like this that REALLY grinds my gears. "You have to be 18 to buy 5-hour energy because it might cause a heart attack...we're not sure, but it's better to be safe than sorry." or "You can't allow smoking in the place of business THAT BELONGS TO YOU because it could give cancer to your customers WHO WANT TO BE THERE."
In summary... the government needs to back off.
Hope you enjoyed...feel free to disagree with me because we're all entitled to our opinions. This was just my opinion.
